Ready or Not

Most of you don't know that I had to take a few weeks off from everything as something happened last month, but we don't know what exactly. It is a long story and one I am trying to put behind me. Any how, I am currently on birth control to stabilize my system and to give me a bit of more time. This week I am supposed to stop the pills and start up again on all the drugs. To be honest I am not sure what I am going to do. I had told myself that this was our last month for a while, but after last month's happenings, I am not sure if I have one more month in me. On top of that, I started back to work which means lots of stress, but to be honest I am excited about my new group. I am hoping that they will be less needy this year and more independent to say the least. I have to make my decision in the next few days. My birthday is Friday and that is the first day of fertility drugs. Maybe it is a sign that I am supposed to do this, but then again maybe it is a sign I am just getting older and one year closer from never being a mom. It is one of those things where it just depends how I look at the glass either half empty or half full. Today I am not sure how I am viewing it and just thinking I need a couple more days of thinking before doing anything. Just keep us in your prayers right now as we come to terns with whatever decision we make. I am really hoping for a sign from God on what to do next.