Dealing

Last week I went for acupuncture and talked to my doctor about everything I was feeling mentally and physically.  She told me that the way that I was feeling is normal and I have every right to feel that way.  She explained to me that if I didn't feel this way, that she would be worried.  I talked to her about how people in my life say things to me about how it will happen when it happens or reduce the stress and she told me to tell those people to f off.  I was literally shocked when she told me that, but it made me feel better.  I asked her a lot of questions that I needed answered and she gave me answers.  I asked her if she was just saying these things to keep the money flow coming or did she mean it.  She said that she did mean it and she would tell me if she thought I should stop going.  Since that appointment I felt so much better about everything.  Then later that week I did something stupid and have been paying for it since.  I accidentally took some old fertility drugs instead of prenatal vitamins and knew instantly when I was sick that night.  Good times..but that showed me that I really don't want to go back on that path of taking drugs again.  Then that either was the beginning side of the drugs or me getting the flu.  Then on top of that I have had a lot of pain on my ovaries.  I am going to give it until the end of the week before going to the doctor.  I am hoping my body is just trying to produce quality eggs.  I am trying to think more positive about this instead of negatively.  I guess we will see at the end of the week what is going on.  Why can't anything ever be easy for us...